Ellie Grabow, 13, didn’t have a bat mitzvah celebration and her family doesn’t belong to a synagogue, but that hasn’t stopped her from being an enthusiastic volunteer in a Chabad-Lubavitch-run program that brings teens and seniors together.
A few days before the start of the High Holidays, Ellie was one of 18 middle-school volunteers who visited residents at the Kaplan Family Senior Residence, an assisted-living kosher facility in River Vale, N.J. Together the group made New Year’s cards and honey jars, heard the blowing of the shofar and discussed Rosh Hashanah memories from decades gone by.
“I think it is so much fun, and it makes the residents so happy,” said Ellie. “I just ask a lot of questions, and it makes their whole day.”
The recent gathering marked the start of the fourth year of “Linking Hearts,” a project of Valley Chabad in Woodcliff Lake, N.J., run by Rabbi Dov and Hindy Drizin. It was created by Rabbi Yosef and Estie Orenstein, directors of the Teen Leadership Initiative, which offers four other programs in addition to “Linking Hearts.” Each session focuses on a Jewish holiday or theme, and entails that the students and the seniors—most in their 80s and 90s—work together on a craft project and engage in informal conversation.
Since its inception, the monthly program has attracted a group of dedicated middle-school volunteers, some of whom come from families with limited Jewish involvement. By all accounts, “Linking Hearts,” according to those involved with it, is quite a popular activity with the residents.
“The students find it rewarding to volunteer and give back. They are brightening a day,” said Orenstein, “and learning a little about their heritage.”
The program also gives the teens a chance to socialize and get to know one another, in addition to the residents. Besides the monthly visits, Orenstein periodically hosts the students for Shabbat dinner. He explained that he and his wife, Estie, had been running a high school volunteer program and felt that they needed a specific offering for students just a bit younger as well.
Though the two of them came up with the program’s name, Orenstein said that this is far from the first Chabad-run program to bring teens and seniors together. Still, he says he is happy and proud that several other Chabad-Lubavitch emissaries nationwide have been holding programs and using the same name.
“I don’t own the name. I don’t own the idea,” he said. “I am constantly sharing ideas with other Chabad rabbis.”
‘This Group Is Special’
The Kaplan residential facility opened in 2006 and is affiliated with Jewish Home Family, a more than 100-year-old agency. Many of the 100 or so residents are visited regularly by relatives, yet nonetheless look forward to the monthly interactions with the young teens, according to Julie Cochrane, director of program and volunteer services.
“The residents are able to reminisce and discuss and talk about their Jewish culture, and share it with the teens and students. It’s a way for the residents to reflect,” said Cochrane.
Cochrane says the teen volunteers have impressed her with their dedication. “I have been here since 2007, and this group is special. These kids amaze me,” she said. “They are all so fantastic with the residents.”
Thelma, an 81-year-old resident who declined to provide her last name, noted that “these kids are so respectful; they are compassionate and kind. They are always willing to help me. My grandchildren live far away, so when the kids from ‘Linking Hearts’ are here, it reminds me of [them]. What a great afternoon it is when they come!”
Ryan Goldstein, a member of a synagogue in Woodcliff Lake, was in search of a service project to undertake in concert with his bar mitzvah studies. His family happens to live next door to the Orensteins, and so he decided to give “Linking Hearts” a try.
The 13-year-old found it so rewarding that he’s back for a second year.
“I wanted to continue. It definitely gives me a different viewpoint,” he said. “I didn’t know how much our being there would mean to the seniors. It makes me feel good that I am doing it.”
Ellie also plans to keep up her involvement indefinitely. Making someone else happy, “you feel on top of the world,” she said.
Her older brother Jordan volunteers through Chabad with the Friendship Circle program. Their mother, Cindy Grabow, views these experiences as invaluable to her children’s development.
“There is so much they get out of it that it is hard to put into words,” she said. “More than anything, I think they both have learned that giving back and showing people that you care about them are extremely important values. It has given them both an incredible amount of confidence and empathy towards others.”
The next program—baking challah with residents of the Jewish Home Family—takes place on Tuesday, Oct. 13. Three days later, on Friday, Oct. 16, “Linking Hearts” volunteers will enjoy Shabbat dinner with the Orensteins. Learn more about monthly programs at: valleychabad.org/linkinghearts.
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